The Lord said to Abram, “Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you, and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and the one who curses you I will curse; and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed.”
So Abram went, as the Lord had told him; and Lot went with him
Genesis 12:1-4
“...And Lot went with him.”
Sometimes you are Abram (who becomes Abraham). Sometimes God calls you and you are destined for great things! You will be a great nation. Blessed by God and in turn you will be a blessing to all people!
And sometimes you’re not.
Sometimes you win, and sometimes you lose.
Now I do not know what was in Lot’s heart. I do not know if he resented having to follow his uncle around, but it seems likely. I’m sure he had his own ideas about what God wanted from God’s people or at the very least what would be best for people. I am sure Lot would have preferred to have been chosen. However, when Abram was called, Lot went with him.
I’m sure when Abram left a land of relative plenty for the deserts of the Negev, Lot thought ‘this old man is crazy.’ Yet, Lot went with him.
I’m sure when Abram pretended not to know his wife, almost giving her away to Egyptian rulers rather than risk his own neck, Lot thought, ‘what a hypocrite, this is our leader?’ Yet, Lot went with him.
I’m sure when Abram said “you take these fertile valleys and I’ll go the other way so that we can both profit and live” Lot thought, ‘this Old man is senile!’. Yet, Lot went with him.
And because of his loyalty, Lot is saved twice by Abraham and God: once when he is captured by Melchizedek and again before God destroys Sodom and Gomorrah.
Lot lost in life. A lot. He lost his father at a young age. His homeland. His flocks and possessions. His home. His family. But he was a faithful and gracious loser, a good example for us.
Not everyone is graceful. If Lot were to have stayed behind in Harran, the reality is there would not have been much for him. His family was gone and he would have been alone. True to his ideals, sure, but hungry, poor and alone. Instead, Abraham and Lot walk together. They walk together through the desert to Egypt. Back out through the wilderness and to the Promised Land. They walk as long as they can together and when they finally part, they do it gracefully, amicably, and with God’s blessing.
How long can you walk with the family when you don’t see eye-to-eye? With your friends? Co-workers?
When someone else gets promoted over, gets what you wanted you it is tempting to want to burn bridges, right? We think, oh that person is a hypocrite! Senile! Immoral! But, is that what is best? For you? For your other co-workers? For the mission?
When a favored child, cousin, sibling, aunt or uncle “wins” it can feel like we lost. How long can you walk with that family member, even if you don’t agree on everything or anything?
Who is going to offer up an alternative voice? Who is going to tell the other side of the story? Who is going to challenge and push and lovingly remind the winners that the losers are still here? Will it be you?
Lot, along with Job and other lovable losers of the Bible, provides us with an archetype of how to be gracious in loss. It’s not an easy model to follow, and I wouldn’t suggest taking all of his life advice (for example, he he ends up alone drunk in a cave with no idea he’s fathered more children). But, Lot follows Abraham, seeks to do God’s will, and be an example of faithfulness even when things don’t go quite right. A challenge for all of us.
No conversation about losing is complete without a note to the winners. When the enemy holds Lot captive, Abraham sacrifices everything to come get him. When Lot’s whole city is going to be burned to the ground, Abraham barters with God for his and their salvation and actual angels come, rescue him, and bring him to safety.
Winners must be gracious too.
There is no harm in sending a note of condolence to someone whose favored candidate lost, to sending a congratulations note to the person with “your” promotion. No shame in reaching out to a relative going through a hard time. No limit to the effort you might go through to save a sibling or relative or friend from their destruction, eEven if it is of their own making.
Abraham pays Lot’s lodging, tuition, and bail. He invests in his business and testifies for him in court. Never once asking if it costs too much.
‘So Abram went, as the Lord had told him. And Lot went with him.’
Will you go too?